Blessing Your Husband's Vision - Part 4

Dear women of God, my sincere prayer is that this series is helping you understand how valuable you are to your husband's vision.  You have more influence over your husband than you might be aware of. 

God has given women tools for expanding their husband's vision.  I would like to list the first one for you to consider.

Proverbs 31:11-12

The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.  She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

A virtuous woman makes it her goal to do her husband good and not evil.  The first tool is then:

1. Faithfulness is one of the attributes of good steward. Hence, to be faithful is to be loyal, committed, involved, attached, and supporter to the course of the gospel.
   

Women are very good at critiquing, critizing, and picking apart their husbands.  When a husband knows that his wife is critiquing and critizing before others, it puts a dagger in his heart, and he wants to die.

Allow me to tell you a quick story to illustrate my point.  Sometime ago, I was friends with a woman whom I met at church.  One day she invited the family over for dinner.  We enjoyed ourselves immensely until she asked me to take a tour of her home.  She proceeded to show me every room of the house that was unfinished due to her husband's incompetence.  I was shocked and embarrassed for her husband, and wanted to die for him. 

I remember quiet vividly looking out from the corner of my eye, and watching this man's entire demeanor change from glee to defeatedness.  It was a sad sight to behold. 

I believe the worst kind of woman is a woman who complains and critizes her husband in the presence of others, and especially in the presence of other men.  This same woman will be the one who is comparing, and might I be so bold as to say, fantazing about other men. 

Let us be faithful women of God, continuly honoring and upholding our husbands in the presence of other people, especially other men.  We must show our husbands that they can trust us with managing their homes, their reputation, and their children.  For then, and only then, will he be known in the gates.

Who can find a virtuous woman?  Her worth is Far Above Rubies. 

Stay the course and keep the faith.

Blessing Your Husband's Vision - Part 3

We live in a generation of visionless men.  As a result, very few wives are happy with their husbands, and very few husbands are happy with their wives.  As wives, we must help our husbands become men of vision and purpose.  The Word of God says that the woman was made for the man not the man for the woman. 

Genesis 2:18

The LORD God said, "It isn't good for the man to live alone. I need to make a suitable helper for him."
 
We do not help our husbands when we critize, degrade, nag, and blame them into a pit of failure.  We must encourage, honor, and help them be the men they were destined to be.  Listen, a great woman can make a good man superior.  Yet, a contentious woman will take a good man and make him weak.  His entire life burdened with her very presence.  Women, men do not want to come home to a contentious woman.  They will go elsewhere.
 
So how do we help our husbands?  Let's ask the following questions:
 
Where is your heart as it pertains to your darling man?

1. Are you more inclined to teach or listen to your husband? 
2. Do you think of yourself as a completer or competer?  Is your life's mission wrapped up in your husband's life mission?  Or do you have an independant spirit?
3. Do you see the care of your household as a blessing or a burden?  A wise woman builds her home.  Proverbs 14:1.  Building your home is part of completing your husband's vision/mission.
4. When you seek to be hospitable, do you view it as a social event or as a means to honor your husband? 
5. Do you think of your skills and gifts as a mean of expressing yourself or to further complete your husband's vision?  Remember, he was not made for you, but you for him.
6. Do you want to expand your own ministry or do you want to expand the ministry of your husband?  Another extremely crucial part of completing his vision is managing his affairs.
7. When a husband demonstrates weakness, do you believe if he listened to you everything would be okay?

Difficult and profound questions to ponder, but ponder we must.  Many of us have contributed to our husband's lack of vision by selfish and independant spirits.  We can change this by following God's principles in being helpers, lovers, and encouragers to the men in our lives. 

Dear wife, you do not understand the power of influence you have over your man.  You can destroy him or you can make him great.  Which one will it be?

Blessing Your Husband's Vision - Part 2

In Part 1 we read a powerful letter of a groom to his bride.  I wanted to share a letter written by a bride to her groom.  It is quite beautiful, and helped me understand the importance of loving my husband.  There's a verse in the letter that touched me most.  The bride is challenging other women to compare their love for their husbands with her love.  There is no comparison was her true sentiment.

My head, my heart, mine eyes, my life nay more,

my joy, my magazine of earthly store.

If ever two were one then surely we.

If ever men were loved by wife than thee.

If ever wife was happy in a man,

compare with you woman if you can.

I prize thy love more than whole mines of gold,

or all the riches that the east doest hold.

My love is such that rivers cannot quench,

nor ought but love from thee give recompense.

Thy love is such that I can in no way repay,

The heavens reward thee in manifold I pray.

Then while we live in love but so presevere,

That when we live no more, we may live ever.

Ann Bradstreet

Blessing Your Husband's Vision - Part 1

One of the first essential elements in a wife is faithfulness.  Faithfulness to, in the largest sense, the heart of her husband doeth safely trust in her.  Perfect confidence is the basis of all true affection.  He has confidence in her affection.  He knows that her heart is unalterably true to him.  He has confidence in her management.  He confides to her the care of his household.  He knows that she is true to all of his interests.  That she is prudent and wise.  Not wasteful; not extravaggent. 

It is one of the essential things in a true wife that her husband shall be able to leave, in her hands, the management of all domestic affairs, and know that they are safe.  And every true woman makes her husband's interest her own while he lives for her carrying her image in his heart, and toiling for her all the days.  She thinks only of what will do him good.

When burdens press upon him, she tries to lighten them by sympathy, by cheer, by the inspiration of love, she enters with zest and enthusiasm into all of his plans.  She is never await to drag him down.  She is a strength to his heart, to help him ever to do no blur and better things.

She bears upon her own heart every burden that weighs upon her husband.  No matter how the world goes with him during the day, when he enters his own door he meets the fragrant atmosphere of love.  Other friends may forsake him, but she clings to him with unalterable fidelity.

When doom comes down and adversity falls upon him, her faithful eyes look ever into his like two stars of hope shining in the darkness.

When his heart is crushed, beneath her smile it gathers itself again into strength like a wind-torn flower in the sunshine.

"You cannot imagine," wrote Edwards about his wife, "What she is in great trials.  Usually so gentle, she then becomes strong and energetic.  She watches me without knowing it.  She softens, calms, and strengthens me in difficulties which distract me, but leave her serene."

J.R. Miller

Twilight

Twilight has taken the nation of teenage and preteen girls by storm--glossy posters fill movies rental stores, bookstores and even family friendly places like libraries. Another seemingly harmless movie for our young ladies it seems---but so far from it.

As mothers who watch over our homes, we need to always be careful about what we put before our children. I personally am very picky about any reading material or movies that I place before our children and Twilight will never be one of them.

I am alarmed to find that even Christian mothers are not careful about such things. They do not realize the repercussions of putting such unfitting literature in front of our daughters as not only time-wasting but it also sows harmful and unnecessary seeds in their lives to desire things which they should not.

A Christian young girl/woman should not be fantasizing about intimacy with a vampire. They should not be lured into the sexual, lustful temptations intertwined with occultism. This is wicked and evil and even worse, parents should not be promoting it. Daughters are easily deceived and can carry much naivety in the romance department--why tempt them in the ways to fornication? They should not be wasting their precious time on such unnecessary and harmful literature and films. These are the precious and important years of their youth. How can we use this time better?

This is a wonderful time to teach our daughters femininity and the Word of God. It is a time to educate them biblically, academically and domestically. There are so many woman today who cannot cook, sew, know their Christian or historical roots. They cannot balance a checkbook, manage a home, or know how to care for children. We should be using these years to teach them life skills and godly character. We need to teach them servanthood and be busy in serving those close and far from us. We need to teach them to be prayerful. These are the things that will benefit them. We should give them literature and movies that promote such and not waste our time on movies that will lead their minds away from purity and godliness. This will take prayer and time examining entertainment materials from the parents but in the long run, well worth the investment.

Here is our measuring stick:

Finally, brothers, whatever is true,
whatever is noble, whatever is right,
whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable
- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy -
think about these things.

Phillipians 4:8

This is why Twilight is banned from our home among other similar writings/films. My prayer is that as mothers and fathers that we would closely examine any material we put before our children and weigh it's benefits and not just follow the world in its patterns and desires for ungodly entertainment.

A Wise Woman Builds Her Home